Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Longing or Obsession

There's this craving, a desire within. Like a hunger ready to devour. My pulse quickens, lungs gasping for air. Every inch of my body tingles. The ground beneath me gives way, and I reach for you. Looking for a response, nothing from your lips.

But your body.... oh your body.... It knows it. A need inside you, waiting to give way. Festering like a disease, slowly over taking.

Don't fight it, lose control. Our bodies will be one, together. Collapsing in the silence. Vacating these empty feelings.

Come to me, seek me out. Such passion you feel. I can see it in your eyes. Lust sought me, pulled me into you.

I only ask one night, a brief memory. A treasure to cherish, buried in my heart.

So now I go to dream. Slumber will show you to me. Our sex will be one, our love stronger.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

Fly Fuck

Climb on, lets go for a ride. Grab hold. You don't have to stay long. Let me take you somewhere you've never been.

Come on child, just relax. Take my hand. I'll help you through this. There's nothing to it. Just be still.

Pull the wings from a fly. Bite the head, and watch it bleed. This is real. This is how sex should feel.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009


Tonight I speak from the heart.

I feel vacant. Hollow. Empty. There's no soul inside of me. If there had been I sold it long ago.

What joy do I bring upon this world? What light? Wherever I roam there is only darkness, confusion, and anguish. I have left a great stain on so many lives.

Perhaps there is reason to be proud of that.

Should I revel in that which I destroy? Feast on their torment. Glorify the horrors for which I have created with my own hands?

No one would ever know. No one except for me. Can one be cocky if they can not gloat? Sure. I know it. I know who I am and what I have done. I have no regrets. I feel no shame. What I do would disgust the worst of sinners.

So that is how it shall be. I will continue to live in this dark shadow, gripping the life that I have created.

Forgive me not.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009


Hammer these nails just six inches deep. Pierce the skin and through the bone. Tie a red ribbon around my eyes so you can't see the tears I cry. Washing away the dirt on my face from the mud you bathed me in.

The sky is as black as your heart. May lightning light the darkened night. A spotlight to shine down upon your hands, soaked in the blood you beat from my chest.

I can see the fear on your lips as you speak lies to the world. Feed them more shit then you can back up, tongue in your mouth spilling it out. Blasphemy. Blasphemy. Blasphemy.

In your mind your doing what is right, but deep in your heart your full of regret. Remorse is the stain slapped on your face. Too filthy to cry, to fucked to look back. When did you die alone? Alone to the wold. Nowhere to go, nothing to be.

Reach to the sky. Bury yourself. Down on your knees, fight for your life.

Blasphemy. Blasphemy. Blasphemy.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009


Tonight I write of love, tonight she shall see mine.

I kissed them, I kissed them. They tasted so sweet. One ring, two ring, a farthing one and two.

Silently I wait, creeping in the shadows, waiting for my love. Everything is so quiet as my heart begins to race.

I run away to save myself. Darkness is my refuge, silence is my drug. Tonight I feel alive, somethings pulsing through my veins. She's unleashed my love, now I'll never be the same. Who knows, maybe one day.. someday.. I will give her a call.

Friday, October 30, 2009


A sickness is growing deep within me, tearing apart my inner core. Cancer that drives itself, holding back my ambition. Vile spills from my mouth, burning my skin. Gnawing at the back of my chest eating me from the inside.

I cry at night to ease the pain, fading away to nothing. I cower in the darkness bleeding upon the dirt. The tears they feel acid hot, as if to intensify the shame.

No one can hear me, not even if I wanted them to. There's solitude in distance. No one would ever look for me anyways. Why would they want to?

Is this remorse? Can I too feel pity? I thought I was above this.

I must be strong. There's no room for weakness. For I am God, and I am the devil. We are but one in the same. Erase this pain. Erase this pain. Erase this pain.

Thursday, October 29, 2009


Last night I heard you cry out his name.

Who is he? Why do I care?

I don't love you, I just love your sex.

Every time I speak your name I feel nauseated. When was the last time I stared into your eyes? At least without crossing mine to blur that face that I despise.

You make me sick.

There's no redeeming qualities hiding under the shell of a whore that you are.

A whore, that's right. Are you surprised?

No, I don't think that you are. It's not the first time someone you loved called you that is it? Truthfully, you probably love it. Makes you wet when you hear it come from someones mouth doesn't it? I bet you lie awake at night fingering yourself and imagining someone whispering it in your ear.

Sex is really all you know, and all you've ever been good at isn't it?

Fucking and sucking to pass away your lonely and pathetic existence. You have no desire to break free from it either do you?

Why would you?

There's probably some sort of powertrip that you get bringing someone to cum. Building them up, keeping them there, making them want that crashing release.

How does it make you feel? Like God? A god of fuck? Is that your aspiration?

Tell me. Tell me what a whore you are. Look me in the god damn eyes. Slap my dick across your face and tell me. Spit on it. Make it messy. Beg me for my cock, you know you want to. I can see it in your eyes.

This is what you want isn't it?

Make me cum. Do it you bitch. I know you want it. Let me see it on your face. Jerk it. Come on, that's it. That's it you filthy fucking whore. Lick your lips, tell me how bad you want it. How good it tastes.


You did it again didn't you?

This is your mind fuck. God I hate you.

Why are you always there when I stare into this mirror?

Tuesday, October 27, 2009


A nerve popped, my brain punctured. I felt something explode inside of me. There was blood spewing from my mouth. Every vein must have blew. I'd kill god, if he existed, for making so much pain.

You're such a dirty little whore. Who are you to make me feel this way? How did you work your way so far under my skin? Now I hide these scars behind fake smiles. Just so you can never see all the pain behind these eyes.

I use to believe we'd be together forever. That our love would be our savior. This world was our hell, and we were tearing it all away.

God damn I thought i knew you. God damn I thought I loved you. God damn I thought you were the one to take away my sins.

Now I feel insulted, and you're the one to blame. Feeling the need to end it, to blow this all away.

You were something I can't believe. You were a sickness eating me. You were cold and dead hearted.

Now I'm dark, something different.

Maybe I just died.

Monday, October 26, 2009


Tasty morsels. So fresh, so filling. I clean the bones dry, devour even the fat. For i wish to not waste my beautiful delight. Mmmmmmm how sweet. Even better with the juices. I love the juices. When they flow, i sip them. Oh how i long for fresh juice. It is all that quenches my thirst. To feel it run past my lips, over my tongue and trickle down into my throat. This is my freedom.

Sunday, October 25, 2009


Within one's own self, there is a drive. A motivation. Each single person's varies. Coming from many different factors. Influenced by life, our surroundings, our up bringing, the people we love, the people we hate. So many things effect our own personal out come.

Yet, can there be one single instance that causes everything? A catalytic event, turning every move we make into a single purpose. Intertwining every stitch together. Until, in the end, everything fits. A life surrounded by questions, never answered. Only to surprise us. Laughing in our faces.

Then is it possible, that all of these things are brought about by something that we've never known? Something that doesnt even exsist in our reality. But, in fact, was reality. And we couldn't realize it.

What would it take to open our eyes? To see a different reality. Looking through the mirror, then stepping through it. Without hesitation, even if the reality of reality was never true. A complete lie. Could we survive? Or would the truth be beyond what we could except?

What if?